Let’s talk about shame, baby, let's talk about you...
I’m Rani Cheema, and I have shame and here’s the thing—you do too.
Shame creeps in when we start comparing our journey to someone else’s. It whispers that we should be further along in our business, that we should be making more money, that we should have it all figured out by now.
Again, stop "shoulding" yourself.
Sound familiar?
Why Shame Is Bullsh*t
Brené Brown defines shame as "the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging." And guess what? It thrives in secrecy.
Travel advisors do this all the time—comparing themselves to others in the industry, feeling like a phony because their business isn’t hitting six figures overnight, convincing themselves they aren’t "successful enough" to claim their expertise. Host agencies have turned into leaderboard competitions. If you’re not a top producer, then what are you even doing here?
Let me tell you something: Shame is a patriarchal construct designed to keep us small.
You’re not special for feeling shame. We all feel it.
You’re not behind. Your business is unfolding exactly how it needs to.
Stop being so f*cking hard on yourself. No one actually has it all together.
Bicycle Face
In the late 1800s, doctors told women that cycling too much would give them “bicycle face”—a strained, exhausted look that was supposedly permanent. The real issue? Bicycles gave women freedom. So they made up a fake condition to keep women from claiming their independence.
The modern version? “If you’re not making six figures, are you even a real business owner?”
It’s all just another way to keep us stuck in shame, afraid to take up space. More on this in a later email about Imposter Syndrome.
I Had to Face My Own Shame, Too
For a long time, I kept pushing my travel business forward, even when it didn’t feel aligned anymore. The universe was throwing up stop signs left and right, but I ignored them. I had built Cheema’s Travels from the ground up. It was who I was. How could I step away from that?
I told myself I had to keep planning culinary trips, even when it stopped bringing me joy.
But the truth? My travel business and my group trip had their worst year in 2024 while everyone else seemed to be thriving I had to admit that, "I love coaching." I love guiding travelers, other travel advisors, and creatives. I love being a medium. I love painting. I love talking about travel—but I don’t love designing itineraries anymore and I had so much shame around that.
It took me a long time to say that out loud without feeling like a failure.
Shame held me back from making a shift that actually felt good. And if you’re feeling stuck in your business, shame is probably holding you back too.
So, What Now?
If you’re feeling like you’re not where you “should” be in your business, let’s talk about it.
My 17-week Mentorship & Coaching program is designed for solopreneurs like you—people navigating the messy, unpredictable, and abstract journey of running a business while also trying to stay true to themselves.
This isn’t about forcing you into a formula that doesn’t fit. It’s about helping you find clarity, confidence, and a way forward that actually feels right.
BIPOC and Non-binary folks receive 50% off for coaching to start April 1, 2025
Only accepting 5 clients each quarter and the books are open!
You don’t have to do this alone. I’ve got you.